Street Life

Home again, haunting the streets (and airwaves)of my beloved city, devising ways to juggle all the bills till the new job starts, missing my love as he returns to work for 8 days in a row before another free weekend. Less than 48 hours ago I was hanging out in Downtown L.A. discussing David Bowie with Australian rock and roll demigods. I shared in their gin and tonic supply and snuck a nibble of backstage brie off the catering tray before wondering if the rules of live rock performance were like the rules of Faery. Perhaps I’ll now have to return to the Teragram for one night a year in perpituity or until someone breaks the spell. I suppose that if those are the terms I can learn to abide by them. Now I’m in an ice cream shop back home and they’re making me pay. My backstage passes have no currency here, and the soundtrack is upbeat indie rock and they sillier kind of vintage Stones, nothing terribly mythic. The sidewalks are all but made of fat, lazy pigeons. I wish they would get off of my cloud.

Roads Ahead

This road goes on about an hour too long and I can’t tell storm clouds from window tint and we are finally near the end of our Grand Bohemian Adventure. I no longer feel like Kerauc or Patti Smith so much as I do someone waiting for a midstack number to be called at the DMV and my travelling companion is getting an antsy look as the nine year old boy two seats ahead loses the last of his cute and starts intoning a mantra of “mom,mom,mom,mom,mom,mom…” ad nauseum. Finally I spy the outlines of houses in the outskirts of the neighborhood I grew up in. We aren’t quite home but we are home enough. That’s one adventure down. Did you get what you needed? Did I? It might be a while before the next chapter unfolds. But there will be one. And I can wait until it comes.

Hymns and Churches

Many a Sunday night of yore, my preteen self stretched out catlike on my canopy bed, staring up at the yellow awning above, thinking “deep thoughts” and listening to the Test Department.

Susie Dunn’s Test Department on KLPX was the successor to the greatly missed “Virgin Vinyl with Jonanthan L.” and the only real alternative or college rock radio offering in Tucson in the late 80’s  short of the extremely limited range, campus only KAMP radio and the occasional successful pirate station signal.

One night I had my mind blown by what sounded like a mirthful, deranged John Lennon soundalike set to psychedelic guitar at the speed of punk. It was “Somewhere Apart” by Robyn Hitchcock and the Egyptians. And all the see through things were crawling from the sea.

Another night I heard The Mighty Lemon Drops and was astounded to learn that they were related to The Clash.

It was on one such Sunday that I heard a song unlike any of the others. It was jangly and weird and absolutely mythic, a Sphinx and a cipher of a song. It was “Under the Milky Way” and it had me enthralled. But it was Tucson in the late 80’s and I was all of 14. I lived in the suburbs and had a measly allowance of about $3 a week. Which meant the odds of me snagging a copy of the cassette in the meagerly stocked alternative offering of the corporate mall record store at a time when I had anything near the money to pay for it were slim to nil. So I taped a copy of that song (and “Reptile” a couple months later) and forgot about the band for a bit.

Flash forward to a road trip of sorts. A mini tour of California with my Baptist youth choir. We stop at a mall in San Jose on the way to our outdoor concert in Yosemite National Park that evening. I sacrifice some of my food money to buy two cassettes at a well stocked record store. They are the soundtrack to Labyrinth and Starfish.

Getting back on the van, a fellow traveller nods at my bag. “What’d you get?” I show him my selections. “Ah,” he nods “they’re called The Church, but they’re not a Christian band, you know, right?” “Yes, I know.” “Great album anyway.” “Oh. Good.” It was.

Found a seat near the back where I could sit by myself, headphones on, eyes partly closed, meditating on this music, a reverent and secular sermon, all the more magical for the ancient redwoods looming above me on the winding and majestic road into Yosemite, my reverie occasionally interrupted by the real life absurdity of vicious semiautomatic water gun fire as the more aggressive tenors ambushed each other through the windows each time one of our vans neared the other. The bus was half soaked and I was half amused but all the same my soul was touched and I’d been changed.

I was obsessed with that album all summer and into that year. But that was also the year I discovered Bowie in earnest. Kind of not a fair fight, that.

In 1990, I finally scored a CD player, spoils of my accident I guess. I got to recover to a soundtrack of U2 and The Wall and Bowie and Roxy Music and The Replacements and Tin Machine, which was just more Bowie. And a new album by The Church came out that year and I had such high hopes. But it was Gold Afternoon Fix and I was comparing it, unfairly I suppose to BOWIE. And such ended my brief affair with The Church for about 25 years.

Music lovers are a fickle bunch. But I missed a number of psychedelic mythic masterpieces in the intervening decades.

Good luck, then, that at last I met The Acolyte, that he might lead me back into the flock and into the arms of the faithful.



There is beauty in the balancing

Your secret worst fear is everyone’s secret worst fear. That the person who loves you for all the things you most love about who you are will hate you for all the same things you hate about yourself.

There come points at which you have no control. The world falls down as the sky falls down in the whole of the planet in the halls of our homes. The world falls down unless we hold it up in the falling.

And sad as it makes us it’s only going to fall again. But there is only hope as long as we keep holding it. Like turtles on the backs of other turtles.